Long awaited update…

I was ill 2 weeks ago. Really ill. I had a 103 temperature at one point and tylenol was barely denting it. Not sure what I had but an antibiotic seem to help me enough to get me on my feet. However it also was short lived as last week I was sort of dragging all week. I am feeling human again now and so I can finally get on here to update.

I don’t have a ton of photos to share so I will just share them now. When you don’t feel well, taking photos is the LAST thing on your mind.

Max swimming last Tuesday:

Nathaniel swimming last Tuesday:

Now on to other news. Tony and I are in the process of becoming foster parents with the hope of adopting. To some this may be a shock, but it has actually been a long time coming. I remember talking to Tony about this back when we went to the Keys in 2015. However it wasn’t till late last year that we actually started acting on it.

I have been keeping a journal of my thoughts on here in a hidden area. Here is that journal:

October 24, 2016 – Tony asked me what I wanted for my birthday this year and I told him a baby. This wasn’t as surprise. We have been talking about this since Nathaniel was about a year old. When I found out I couldn’t have any more children (I would be even more high risk then I was with Nathaniel’s pregnancy) I really started searching if I really REALLY wanted another child. I tried not talking about it. I tried being happy with just my boys. But at the end of the day, I didn’t feel complete. It felt like there is another child out there just waiting for us.

So we talked about adoption. The price tag is SCARY. $25,000+ and you don’t have any guarantees (the child could be born with undisclosed problems, the birth family could change their mind) with that price tag either. I started thinking over what I would really want an adoption to look like for us. I really want an open adoption. So then after talking about it with Tony, and we agreed that if $25,000 fell from the sky into our laps we would be adopting. Sadly that didn’t happen. I wonder why? Anyway, I talked to a mom online who foster to adopted several children. She said that she got children that needed nothing other then normal well visits and they were ALL from the hospital after birth when she got them.

It sounded nice (even if it was a bit of a pie in the sky dream to have a perfectly healthy baby) so I talked it over with Tony and he agreed. This would be a much easier way to adopt as the state pays for much of the needed stuff up front, then they pay you to watch the child when you get them. That later bit I am a bit leary of. It doesn’t seem right. But I get it. It becomes a “job” to take care of a child of the state.

So Friday I contacted an agency to start the initial look see process. Sadly I contacted the wrong department (it was a private agency, I didn’t know the difference) so today I contacted the right agency. They told me they would be in contact with me in the next 10 days. Then I would be told of an information meeting where I could ask questions and get the paperwork to get started with everything. I know we will have to do 27 hours (9 three hour sessions) of training before we are licensed.

I should also state at this point that EVERYTHING I have read is that foster children are encouraged to go on vacations with the family. So this will in no way interfere with trips to see people. We will have to get permission (preferably a month ahead) for trips over 3 days. However I don’t need permission every time I go to neighboring states provided I am not gone more then 3 days (though they would like a heads up just in case). So taking Max to German doesn’t require permission. That would get old FAST!

In the meanwhile I am working on a plan to organize and get the house ready to be approved for the home study. This house was built in 1950 or so. It was not designed with a ton of storage. So we have storage issues. That is something I am hoping to fix. I will update as we find out more information.

November 2, 2016 – Well we have heard from the state and there is an information meeting for “resource parents” (I guess it isn’t called a foster parent anymore) on November 14, 2016. So that should be interesting. We have started to make progress in reorganizing the house. We have one room done. This weekend we are going to tear apart the kitchen. We don’t know what we will find so we need extra time for that. We have had a massive storage problem in kitchen since we purchased this house. Hopefully that will change soon.

January 11, 2017 – Well we have had our resource parent meeting and our first meeting with the social worker. We have also done a MAJOR organization project with our house. Things that never really bothered me before we have changed to reflect what the state is likely to want. Our meeting a week ago today, we were told some things that we would need to change in our house. We will have 2 more meetings with the social worker (mainly one on one’s with Tony and I) and then we will have at least one home inspection (they will also inspect our cars for proper working order, state inspections, the like). It sounds like this process could take 6 months or more.

Tony and I will be going to classes starting on January 31. We have 27 hours of education that we have to go through. It will be during the week as we have too much on our Saturdays right now. It will only be for the month of February though so that is good. Once it is done, we are good for a year I think. The classes that they require yearly, some of those can be done online so that would help a lot.

Our house wasn’t in that bad of shape. Minor things we were told we need to fix. “Clear access to the electrical box.” “3 feet of clearance around the furnace.” “Bookcases secured to the walls.” “Medicines out of reach of children.” “Nothing toxic where children can access it.” Basic things really.

Right now we are waiting for references to be mailed into the social worker so she can review then talk to us about anything that shows up in the references. We have filled out TONS of forms at this point (6 I think, some of them we had to do separately), been fingerprinted, and we also have had nearly every background check imaginable. I bet the FBI is more thorough but not by much!

We are told that we will be licensed for a maximum number of children but we will likely only get what we want. I have said I want an infant girl under the age of 9 months. I was told that it would likely be a drug exposed baby coming directly from the hospital. So sad. But so is all of this. I think we will be licensed to take 2 children.

January 20, 2017 – Waiting is the hardest part… and it is. We are set up for our class that starts in 11 days… I think. I haven’t heard anything to the contrary. No talk of another meeting yet. I have child care set up for my children for the class. I guess that is progress.

February 1, 2017 – We had our first class yesterday. There were a total of 5 participants, an instructor, and a security guard. Tony and I were 2 of the 5. Small class. We are all coming from different times in our lives and all want different things. I think Tony and I asked the most questions. The book that goes along with the class is over 400 pages. However much of it is written in large font with lots of blank spaces and pointless things like agendas for each class. We didn’t get into the heavy stuff yet, that comes next week. 🙁 We will get to talk to a licenser who will look at our house before they come out. This will be good as we can ask specific questions pertaining to us as to address issues before he/she comes out. One class down, 7 more to go. I haven’t heard from the resource worker (the social worker for us). I think she is waiting for Tony’s last reference (medical) to come in. Typical man doesn’t go to the doctor regularly and therefore they will not fill out forms till they see him. ((rolleyes))

So this brings us to today. We are doing our classes twice a week and it seems to be going well. I write down questions when I think of them for the instructor and ask them all at one time at the beginning of class. A class next week deals with the home inspection and that should be interesting. Yesterday we moved things around in the basement. It wasn’t easy and I lost my sewing area, however I think everything should be good now… though we still have a bit more to do down there. There is always something that is out of order isn’t there?

I hope to have another meeting with our resource worker this week. One step closer!