Shocking people!

Yesterday I was a Debbie Downer about this cycle working. Today I am not.

I felt more cramping yesterday so that made me feel everything is okay. I also found myself crying at a news story on the radio about the Israel and what they are going through right now. Then later in the day I just about burst into tears for no reason.

This morning I was nauseas for a bit, now I am just tired. I would sleep but I am a bit afraid of what Max would do if I did that.

I want to touch on a subject that I have been asked about a bit. I want to adopt a deaf child regardless if baby E sticks or not. People have wondered why. I have told them my reasons but then I saw yesterday (maybe it was Wednesday) I saw something that made me really stop in my tracks. I was looking for hope about my cycle and Dr. Google was there, so I went searching. I stumbled on a message board, where I could see the signatures of people. I read for a bit then I saw a signature that stopped me in my tracks. A woman had in her signature line basically this (paraphrase here). She got pregnant with triplets. Carried them for quite a while (further then I got clearly). Had them and one came home in less then a week. The other 2 were in the hospital for something like 90 days and 120 days. She had genetic testing done on the children and found out that the 2 that were in the hospital the longest, were identical twins and they had a genetic “defect” that “should have been detected in a special ultrasound” that she had. She then gave up these two “less then perfect” children for adoption! One was adopted right away, and the second one took a few more months. I got the impression that the second one was more “abnormal”.  This was all in her signature! She was almost proud of this, or at the very least, not ashamed of it.

Clearly I don’t agree with this woman. I would have given my right arm to be able to have Emily, Alexander and Christopher alive, and living with us, regardless of how well or ill they may have been. I can’t even imagine giving up a child like this woman did. It really makes me question her sanity. However sadly, I know she isn’t alone in this thought. There are sadly lots of family that have children that have “issues” and the parents adopt them out. Deafness is one of those conditions. When I have researched deaf children in China that are available for adoption I see one story after another that is just awful. A child that is 4 and abandoned at a train station is the one the that sticks out in my mind. I can’t even fathom doing this to a child that you have bonded with for 4 years!

These children deserve families that will love them and not be bothered by their uniqueness. I feel that we are one of those families.

Changing gears, we are going on a road trip tomorrow so we can spend Thanksgiving with my mother. I will be updating the blog as much as I can while we are gone!